You get what you get, when you get a child. It's not your job to mold them or change them or coerce them or manipulate them or harangue them or beat them into being what you want. Is to be in relationship with the human you created & guide it into being ~ themself. They are not you. You do not know what they brought with them when they arrived. You do not control every other human with whom they will interact. You are not their only influence. They are not who they become because of or in spite of you. The whole world shapes your child. Your job is to witness. Your job is to show up. Your job is to offer information & the occasional hard won piece of wisdom. Your job is to be such a great version of yourself that they strive to take a little bit of who they perceive you to be & twist & shape & massage it into connecting with the being they are constructing for themselves using the tools you put in their tool belt gathered by attending life’s dramas, goings on, experiences, pitfalls, & happenings to build the kind of life they want to make for themselves. You get what you get. What you do with yourself as a result of them is up to you. Hopefully, they’ll make you a better person.
Christina Springer is an Alt.Black artist who uses text, performance, video and other visual expressions. Cave Canem shaped her voice. Her fourth collection of poetry, The Splooge Factory, was released by Frayed Edge Press in November 2018. Currently finishing its cross country exhibition is Futuristic Relics & Motherboards Sacred: a collection of 75 paintings, fabric, mixed media objects and texts from the museum of our Black utopian womanist future. Springer resides in Pittsburgh where she home educates her son.
Raising Mothers is a free online literary magazine for femmes and NBPOC parents of color. We center the work of the marginalized in our effort to normalize our stories and existence on the web, and in life.